Days of abstinence: 24
Days until surgery: 60
Weight: 165.4 pounds
My Program is not as much
about my weight as it is about my health and my physiological and emotional
responses to certain foods. I like my
food program because it keeps food in perspective. I’ve been 100% On Program for 24 days.
As a
quick reminder, On Program means on the Whole 30 program; the program
eliminates sugar and sugar substitutes, alcohol, dairy except clarified butter,
legumes, seed oils, and grains; the diet consists of 3 meals a day that include
a reasonable portion of protein (deck of cards or palm size), half a plate of
vegetables (all vegetables, including root vegetables [like potatoes] and
squash, but excluding legumes [like peas and lima beans]), and a small serving
of fruit. The Whole 30 includes healthy
fats like coconut oil, olive oil, animal fats (including clarified butter),
avocados and a limited amount of specified nuts (cashews and macadamias top the
list).
The first few days were
pretty rough. I craved sugar all day and
all I really wanted to do was eat a chocolate bar. I got through that few days by texting Carla
every time I had a craving to remind myself that being healthy was a much more
important motivation than satisfying a craving.
After about Day 5, the program got relatively easy and about 10 days
into it I started feeling really good again.
I started feeling happier and sleeping better, in spite of work, which
has been nuts. Now, 24 days into my Program,
food seems to have a healthy level of importance in my daily routine. Yes, I think about food, but I don’t think
about it 24/7. I think about it in the
context of planning when and what I am going to eat. I have to plan around events and a busy schedule. I need to carve out the time to plan our menu
for the week and cook our meals. I need
to set aside a little time each day to eat and enjoy my meals.
There is an irony to my Program. Most people seem surprised and almost sorry
for me when I tell them I am never going to eat sugar again. They exclaim that they would miss sweets too
much. If I happen to mention that I don’t
eat grains either, they really think I’m depriving myself of all food that
tastes good and is “fun to eat.” These
very same people complain every day when I heat up my lunch because, get this,
it smells so good. Every day I hear the
same things, “That smells so good! What
are you eating today?” “I’d pay you to
bring my lunch to work every day!” “Wow!
That looks like a fantastic dinner!” These same people are heating up
left over pizza or grilled cheese sandwiches for their lunches. I do not look at their meals, lustfully. I am quite happy with my lunches, just as
they are. My coworkers think I’m depriving myself when I tell
them I don’t eat sugar and grains, yet they would happily swap their lunches
for mine. I can’t say that I blame them,
my lunches are delicious!
So, yes, a portion of every
day and every week is allotted to thinking about food and planning meals, but
it is not an obsession nor do I have cravings.
When I am On Program, I spend a healthy amount of time thinking about
food. It’s important to eat. Of course it is going to take time every week
to make sure we have healthy food in the house.
Of course I have to plan around meals and make sure I take the time to
eat my meals and enjoy them. But I am
relieved that food is no longer an obsession and that I no longer have to think
about it all the time. With the
exception of the first several days On Program, this is not about will
power. It’s about planning and executing
the plan. All in all, being On Program
requires a little more planning and a little more work, but it requires a lot
less effort. Decisions get made, food
gets cooked, meals get eaten. Cravings
are gone. I don’t need to make thousands
of micro-decisions a day (Am I going to eat this? How about that? Ooh, that looks good, one won’t hurt. Donuts today!
Oh, I’ll have one, well maybe just half.
Sure, I’ll have a mint. It’s
sugar free, right?). Being On Program is
so much easier than not being On Program.
It’s like the difference between night and day.
I do feel great, a little
exhausted, but great. I am exhausted
because of work and post-season baseball.
Both are emotionally draining. I
am sleeping like a rock. I lay down and
clunk, I’m out like a light.
I am happy with my program
and my “relationship” with food. I feel
like I have food in proper perspective and I am not struggling with my Food
Program. But I am getting frustrated
with the scale. I want, more than
anything, to be healthy, and I am doing the things (with regard to diet and
exercise) I need to do to be healthy. I
know that. But I also want to lose some
weight. To be precise, I want to lose 15
pounds prior to December 16
th.
I’ll be satisfied with 10, tickled with 12 – 13, and thrilled with
15. Yet, I have not lost any weight in a
couple of weeks. I look back on my diet
and exercise and know I am doing the right things, things that have worked in
the past, so what is it? I know what it
is. It’s stress, plain and simple. I just did a quick google search on how
stress impedes weight loss and came up with this article, which I thought was
pretty decent.
http://www.builtlean.com/2012/10/22/stress-weight-loss/ I didn’t fact check it, but it sums up, pretty well, what I have read over the last
several years on the subject of how stress impacts our hormones, health, and
weight loss. One thing that I did pick out of the article
was that when stress goes up, the body’s hormone rhythm gets whacked out, and
if you happen to be a coffee drinker, it is natural to compensate for this by
drinking more coffee. Drinking more
coffee exacerbates the hormone whack-out, which leads to more coffee
drinking. This hit home because I
noticed this week that I started fixing a second pot of coffee and bringing it
to work with me. OK, fine. I won’t do that anymore. I am not cutting out coffee, but I will go
back to my normal 2 cups a day, instead of 3 or 4.
We are going through a
major transition at work. I think we all
go through periods like this, no matter what are jobs are, when we are called
on to do too much. Most of the time I
can keep work in proper perspective. Now
is not one of those times. Right now,
it’s overwhelming. This past week was
better than the week before, though, so that’s good, but next week is going to
be rough. I am not working at all today,
so that’s great!! I do have to work all
day tomorrow (Sunday). That’s not so
great. The really good news is that
after October 31st, everything should calm down significantly and my
work life should be more or less normal, once again. In the
meantime, I’d like to make a little progress on the scale. I have to figure out a way to relax and
reduce this feeling of being overtaxed and over stressed and still get my job
done. I am exercising most days, but I
am not running. I think a little jogging
(or even walking) outdoors might help, because when I jog I get outside and I
am not exposed to a lot of stimulation.
My Black Fire workouts with Bob Harper aren’t exactly under-stimulating. They are an action packed 30-40 minutes of very
efficient get-at-it strength training combined with cardio exercise. One of the keys here is that the videos are
relatively short. Usually they are about
35 minutes long. Prior to doing the
videos as my primary source of exercise, I was exercising for a full hour. I’ve been taking the advantage of the fact
that the videos are only 35 minutes long and squeezing an extra 25 minutes into
my mornings. I don’t want to substitute
a run for a Black Fire workout because I love the variety in the workouts. Every week there are five unique workouts
that target different muscle groups or skill sets. My body is toning up, by balance is
improving, I even think I am getting a little faster running bases. My ability to “burst” is improving. I credit these crazy workouts I am doing for
these changes. What I can do and what I
have been thinking about doing is I can get outside and jog/walk for the
remainder of the hour. Just because the
video is only 30 minutes long doesn’t mean I should only exercise for 30
minutes. This week, I am going to make
that change. After spending 30 minutes
with Bob Harper and the Black Fire gang, I will throw on some warm gear and go
for a jog (or a walk, if my body says no to running).
Jack, bless his heart, is covering for me at
home. He’s cleaning the bathrooms and
kitchen, in addition to his normal chores.
The only chores I have to do are cooking and paying the bills. That is totally manageable. I really think I need to figure out how to
get some relaxing into my day, every day, in spite of work (and the Royals! Really, the Royals just need to sweep the
Blue Jays in the ALCS. That would help a
lot!).
I guess I am actually a
little aggravated with myself for caring what the scale says right now. In reality, all things considered, I am doing
great! In spite of everything, my food
Program is spot on. In spite of
everything, I am exercising several days a week. In spite of everything, I am enjoying the
ball games with Jack. In spite of
everything, I’m holding it together and everything is going to be alright. Sometimes I am too hard on myself. I know this.
I need to relax. I know
this. So there it is. That is my issue for today. I need to give myself a break and appreciate
the fact that I am managing a difficult moment as well as can be expected. Perhaps I shouldn’t be getting on the scale,
but then again, perhaps weighing myself is exactly the right thing for me to do
being. When I think about it, and it
took this entire blog post for me to get to this point, the fact that that
needle is not budging is forcing me to address the one thing I am doing on a
daily basis that is impairing my health; I am stressing too much over my
job. I need to get that piece figured
out. I will get it figured out. That will be the focus over this next week. Figure out what I need to change so that my
job doesn’t overly stress me. I got
this!
To sum it up, I am going to
change three things this week:
- Go back to my normal coffee
consumption, which is 2 cups a day.
- Workout for an entire hour
by adding a jog/walk to the end of my Black Fire routine.
- Get the support I need at
work from my bosses so that I don’t feel like I am carrying too much of the
load on my own shoulders.
That’s the plan. Feels like a good one. As always, thanks for listening!
Have a wonderful day!! Go Royals!!
