Last week I had two days off in a row, which is the first time that has happened since May, when Andrew, Rebecca, and my grandchildren came to visit me. Today is my second day off in a row, making it two times in two weeks that I have actually had two days off in a row! Wow, this almost feels normal!! We should be slow enough and we should have enough help from here to the end of our contract to get two days off every week.
I am getting enough sleep, which is a huge plus, but that is about all I am doing right. The sugar addiction holds tight and I am still not exercising often enough. I will never give up, though. I miss Jack terribly and I know that has a lot to do with the sugar, I use it as a drug to substitute for the fact that Jack and I aren't together. It's not effective, I still miss him and I feel like crap. While I know this intellectually, the cravings are still strong. The closer I get to knowing I am going to go home, the stronger I feel, though, so each day I renew my commitment to care for myself properly. Perhaps, today, it will take. I feel like it will.
I have been busy with my days off. Last week I shopped and shopped and shopped. I have just a little bit of Christmas shopping left to do this morning and then I will spend the rest of the day wrapping presents, getting them ready to mail, and packing up my room. It'll be a busy day. I won't get it all done, but I should be able to make significant progress.
Yesterday I went to Brattleboro, VT, to meet with the consultants that will help us find our inn. I won't say I learned an incredible amount yesterday, but the meeting was useful in that they got to know me a lot better and they have a much better understanding of what we are looking for. I know this process can take up to a couple of years and I stressed to them that finding the right inn was much more important to us than finding an inn quickly. Maybe it will take a year. Maybe two. But we will find our inn one of these days.
In the meantime, on December 22nd, Jackie will be here and on the 23rd we will head west, back to Kansas City. I'll spend the next months getting the house ready to sell, getting myself in great shape, and finding an inn. I am looking forward to it.
While on the surface it seems as if this last 36 days at the Bernerhof Inn should be a cake walk, it is turning out that it is not. It is incredibly difficult to cede the reins to the incoming innkeepers and watch them start to change some of the things that we were proud of accomplishing. We are rapidly becoming unimportant in the scheme of things, yet I am still fighting battles (for physical improvements of the property) as if it really matters to me one way or another whether these things get done. I should just let it go and let Jeremiah and Lisseth worry about such things, but, instead, I keep beating my head against the wall. My efforts aren't completely in vane, every now and then I win a battle and we make a little progress on inn improvement, but it's a slow and tortuous process. Why can't I just let it go? Why do I get excited and peeved about the ridiculousness of it all? I do not know the answer to that question. If I could just let it go, I'd be much happier and less stressed. I'm going to work on that.
At my meeting yesterday with Inn Partners we talked about the importance of reinventing an inn periodically, about every 7 years or so. Heide talked about how important it was to always have an eye toward updating and refreshing and how 7 years was about how long you could go before needing to completely redecorate and update a room. This makes sense to me, as all of the Bernerhof redecorating was done in 2010, 7 years ago, and it is obvious that all of the rooms need an update. We've been fighting to replace bedspreads, carpets, and curtains since we arrived, with some minor success. I will certainly remember this lesson when we have our own place.
There is news of progress on the Jeremiah and Lisseth front. They have come to an agreement regarding the terms of their contract with Dick and have a meeting scheduled at 1:30 today to sign said contract. Also, at 8:30 this morning they will be here with Brenda, one of Dick's partners, to go through the rooms and hallways to asses the need for the carpet and comforter changes that we have been insisting need to take place. This means Dick is already handing control of these matters to J & L, which really is fine by me, though it does emphasis the fact that Carla and I are becoming redundant. I'm not sure exactly what we will be doing for the next 36 days. Once J & L start full time on December 1, it wouldn't surprise if a lot of our time is spent painting rooms and doing other minor improvements. We shall see.
I'm ready to go home. I miss Jack. I want to sleep in my own bed. 36 more days, and he will be here.
Now I need to clean my room and get busy. I have a lot to do today, before my busy weekend gets underway.
Have a good one out there!
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