4/12/2012: Frustration Leading to Changes

OK, I weighed in today and was not pleased with the results. I gained almost a pound, putting me back at 212 pounds, and I am now touching my line instead of being below it. I feel incredibly frustrated because I have been doing all of my exercise and I have been careful about my food. After only losing a pound last week and gaining some of it back this week I feel like I have really hit a plateau. It makes me want to scream or cry or something. At least it doesn't make me want to give up. In fact, it is making me more determined. So, what am I going to do about it?

I could wait a few days and see if my pattern of losing weight on the weekends helps, but I don't really want to do that. I am afraid if I get to my next weigh-in day on Monday and I still haven't seen results that I will get seriously depressed. I want to take action, now. So I am going to do two things differently, beginning today. First, I am going to be more strict about calorie counting and go from trying to net less than 1200 a day to consuming less than 1500 a day, regardless of the amount of exercise I do. Second, I am going to add a mile to my cardio days. I have been jog/walking 4 miles a day and because I am jogging more and more of it, it is taking me less and less time. Yesterday, Carla and I got it done in about 50 minutes and my goal is to exercise for an hour every day. Starting tomorrow, I am going to add another mile. It is likely that most of that extra mile will be walking, but that's OK. I also need to be more disciplined about drinking enough water. Lately I've been letting myself get too consumed with my work and have been lazy about filling my water jug up in the morning.

Jeremy and I also kicked it up a notch at the gym this morning. He added running two tenths of a mile as fast as I can before I started my workout and after each set of two exercises. My normal speed that I can sustain for relatively long periods of time is 5 mph, my fast-as-I-can is 6 mph. When I run 6 mph for 2 tenths of a mile, I am huffing and puffing and definitely cannot carry on any kind of conversation. It definitely made the work out more challenging this morning!

Carla leaves for Colorado next week and at least a couple of people are concerned about this getting harder for me when she leaves. It will be harder, that's true. Carla does a couple of big things that help a lot. She cooks, which is huge. She not only cooks, but she picks recipes and helps Jack put a shopping list together; which means I just don't have to think about food very much. I get home from work and, voila, there's dinner. Almost like magic. And because Carla is vegan and also counting calories, everything she cooks is super healthy, not to mention delicious, since she is such an awesome cook. It will be harder when I am the one planning and cooking the meals, but I still have help. Jack, thank goodness, has no trouble eating left-overs, so we plan and cook two meals a week, and eat left overs the other nights during the week. We supplement that with a chef's salad for dinner one night a week and we almost always eat out somewhere on Friday nights. Also, since I have started working out, Jack has been doing the grocery shopping while I am at the gym. He will also help me prepare meals, which speeds up the process. So while I have enjoyed being spoiled rotten by having my meals prepared for me by my lovely daughter, it's not like I am going to go from feast to famine. I have a very supportive husband who helps me in many, if more subtle, ways.

The other things Carla does for me, which is huge, is she exercises with me on my cardio days. She almost always gets up with me at 4:30 in the morning and runs with me. I don't think I will have a subsitute for that and I will miss her on my morning runs. The good news is that I have been doing this for 6.5 weeks, now. By the time she leaves I will have been doing this for over 7 weeks. That is getting darn close to being a habit. It's easy for me to get up at 4:30 in the morning. It's getting easier for me to put on my shoes and get out the door. I'll miss her, I really will, but I don't think losing her company and support in the morning will derail me. In fact, she and I are both looking forward to how much better I am going to look the next time she sees me, which may be as late as October! It's another motivator, looking forward to her reaction when she sees me next.

There's more I want to say this morning and I have not had time to proof read this post, but it is getting late already and I have to go to work, so I am going to sign off, for now. More later...including proofing and editing. I hope this was not too choppy...

I CAN do this!! I AM DOING THIS!! Have a great day!!